Limited time offer!

[art leong]

Originally Posted by Billy Nees

As it's come to my attention that the new FFFords can make it all of the way down to L/S now, I feel that the time is now right for me to offer (in conjunction with the West End Buck Hunting and Binge Drinking Club) to YOU, the Stocker racing community, the chance to learn, FIRST HAND, how to get out from under that old, no longer competitive, Stock Eliminator car of yours!
I will PERSONALLY begin holding 3 day classes on how to pick AND find old, oddball, overlooked combos that can be turned into perfectly good, servicable, competitive Stockers! For you Camaro lovers, I will also give instruction on how to determine what a 6 cylinder engine looks like AND I will prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that they came with V8 engines that were NOT Big Blocks!
Day 1 will begin in the classroom (my kitchen table) with instruction into how the written English language and Math can come in VERY handy when trying to survive in Stock Eliminator in the 21st century! There will also be a very gray and vague lesson on the Rulebook and the language of Techspeak (which makes the English language skills you just learned a somewhat moot point) AND Fuzzymath(ditto those math skills)!
Day 2 will begin bright and early in some of Central Pennsylvanias fines Junkyards where you will learn the difference between a rotting POS and a fine candidate for a good lower class Stocker. I will also be giving tips on how to do bodywork with ducttape, spraybomb paintjobs and snakebite.And for you Camaro lovers I will show you what a REAL 307 2V engine looks like!
Day 3 will find us in my personal garage where I will be teaching you how to bull**** about all of the cars you COULD build while sharing a bottle of Cuervo with your buds.
As you can plainly see, you should be prepared for 3 wonderful days of fun and excitement not to mention all that you will have learned and even though I will have charged you WAAAAY too much, I can assure you it won't be as much as a new CJ.
Disclaimer; NO REFUNDS (I'll probably spend more on Cuervo and bail then you'll give me anyway). Hands will be checked at the door, no one with "pastey white girly hands" need apply. If you don't have grease under your nails and scarred knuckles, you will be turned away! In the event that you DO have "pastey white girly hands" and you decide that you want to enroll in the class anyway be warned, threatening me with more money will probably just piss me off and I AM armed.
I'll be looking forward to seeing you all!

Hey Billy do you want to hire a guest lecturer?

[Jack Matyas]

Originally Posted by art leong

Hey Billy do you want to hire a guest lecturer?

Guess I'll have to be the guest speaker -- and the main topic will be--- 2011"Techspeak "( both for tech on the cars and understanding the tech Dept . ) for the novice racer . And even though I've never raced a 6 cylinder Camaro all the principles are the same for a six as they are for a V8 ( more or less ) .

And for all you naysayers out there the addition of all the new cars puts us further away from being put out to pasture .These kind of rumors have been around for more than thirty years and we're still racing .............

A second seminar is already being scheduled for the graduates of the first that will take place in early Summer of this year but is filling up fast as Billy's kitchen seating is extremely limited ..................not to mention his fridge only holds so much suds .

[Ed Fernandez]

Originally Posted by Jack Matyas

Guess I'll have to be the guest speaker -- and the main topic will be--- 2011"Techspeak "( both for tech on the cars and understanding the tech Dept . ) for the novice racer . And even though I've never raced a 6 cylinder Camaro all the principles are the same for a six as they are for a V8 ( more or less ) .

And for all you naysayers out there the addition of all the new cars puts us further away from being put out to pasture .These kind of rumors have been around for more than thirty years and we're still racing .............

A second seminar is already being scheduled for the graduates of the first that will take place in early Summer of this year but is filling up fast as Billy's kitchen seating is extremely limited ..................not to mention his fridge only holds so much suds .

Well Jack now the new "kit cars" are capable of running as low as L.I don't think I have to worry unless Ford of Fiat decides to build a twin turbo injected factory ported OHC motor rated at 150 HP and someone wants to spend a whole lot of dough to run Q,R,T.Then they'll have the whole eliminator in their control.Don't think it could happen?Who would have thought a stocker could go 9.30s a few weeks back.
So in the end Stock will come down to being the playground for rich,bored guys,some
in possession of the fore mentioned "pasty white girlie hands".

[Lew Silverman]

'69 Nova's came with four cylinders!

Lew

[Billy Nees]

Originally Posted by Lew Silverman

'69 Nova's came with four cylinders!

Lew

Lew, YOU can still be saved!

[Bob Mulry]

Billy,

Do you take American Express?????

I have no money only plastic.

Bob

[Billy Nees]

Originally Posted by Bob Mulry

Billy,

Do you take American Express?????

I have no money only plastic.

Bob

Only dead Presidents need apply! Otherwise, "No Habla Ingles".

[rawhide]

Originally Posted by Lew Silverman

'69 Nova's came with four cylinders!

Lew

Lew,
1982 Camaro's came with a four cylinders also.
Roland

[bigshow2966]

This is my buddy Mike Jeffrey's Diplomat. Not the most popular car Ma Mopar ever built. (Unless you were a police officer) It's a Slant 6 2 bbl motor. It was a national record holder for a while, and was a #1 qualifier. It will still run .8 under most anywhere without breathing hard. I know he has way less then 15K in it, and he has a ball every time he takes it out.

[Jack Matyas]

Originally Posted by Ed Fernandez

Well Jack now the new "kit cars" are capable of running as low as L.I don't think I have to worry unless Ford of Fiat decides to build a twin turbo injected factory ported OHC motor rated at 150 HP and someone wants to spend a whole lot of dough to run Q,R,T.Then they'll have the whole eliminator in their control.Don't think it could happen?Who would have thought a stocker could go 9.30s a few weeks back.
So in the end Stock will come down to being the playground for rich,bored guys,some
in possession of the fore mentioned "pasty white girlie hands".

Ed - Much of this is true .........but in the end when we're racing you still have to get out the shoe polish and put a number on the window ( and run it ) and get a light -- you proved that to all of us at Norwalk ( and Reading ) last year .Big money cars have the exact same chance as you to win ...........