Mailman's Last Day

[KEN BUGAJ]

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the
mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.


When he arrived at the first house on his route he
was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent
him on his way with a big gift envelope.


At the second house they presented him with a box
of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of
terrific fishing lures.


At the fourth house he was met at the door by a
strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the
hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the
bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had
ever experienced.


When he had had enough they went downstairs, where
she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage,
blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly
satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.


As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill
sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too
wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"


"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband
that today would be your last day, and that we should do something
special for you. I asked him what to give you."
He said, "Screw him, give him a dollar."
The lady then said, "The breakfast was my
idea."