Nookie Green

[KEN BUGAJ]

An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church.


>


> 'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last confession. I


> had sex with Nookie Green twice last month.'


>


> The priest sighed and told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say


> three Hail Mary's.'


>


> Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional. 'Father , it


> has been two months since my last confession. I've had sex with Nookie Green


> twice a week for the past two months.'


>


> This time, curiosity captured the priest: 'And who is this Nookie Green?'


>


> 'A new woman in the neighborhood', the sinner replied.


>


> 'Very well,' sighed the priest. 'Ye go and say ten Hail Mary's.'


>


> At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a


> tall, voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary.


> The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up


> the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and


> very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes.


>


> The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and


> matching green shoes sat with her legs opened slightly apart, but just


> enough to suggest she wasn't wearing any underwear.


>


> The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, 'Is that Nookie Green?'


>


> The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his ears but managed to stammer a


> reply, 'No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes'.


>